How they do it in Japan

At this time of year everyone is full of good cheer and the familiar seasons greetings cards are out of the deck. However the fun of the festive season has been overtaken by a spear-wielding spill or two in politics.

But while everyone is caught up in the make up of Tony Abbott’s front bench it’s important that we do not find ourselves steering away from the real issues of the day.

One that has been corroding away at our social fabric, yet treated like the elephant in the room needs a spit and polish return to the front pages.

It’s not the CETS (Clayton’s Emission Trading Scheme), it’s not the cost of tertiary education, nor is it about talking up closing the gap, and has little in common with people on boats seeking a new life – it’s deeper than that.

It’s something as common as genitals and as widely seen as a tan in Tahiti – in case you were looking for the beast with the trunk I will give it up – it’s the lack of protocol when greeting a friend or acquaintance of the opposite sex.

After a weekend away with some mates and respective family, my eyes have been drawn open as to the fact there is no common way of doing the actions that go with “G’day, great to see you?”. It was made even more apparent when I accidentally head butted a girl while attempting to kiss her cheek at a mothers group gathering for our kids.

When in Europe it was clear that a kiss on each cheek was the done thing, with the noted exception of the Dutch who went mmwa mmwa mmwa. This is an obsessive worst nightmare as they will want to even it out with a fourth and get a slap for their kinky behaviour.

But in Australia there is no accepted right way to do the business. I have seen four varieties and would like to actually come up with a protocol.

1. The Uneasy- someone leans in before cutting back while the other leans in creating an awkward moment. Usually ends in a hand shake and a red-faced smile.

2. The Easy Goes – as common as Vegemite toast at breaky, it’s a smooth distant cuddle and kiss on one cheek.

3. The how you doin’ – a big cuddle as chest meets chest/breast, followed by a kiss on the cheek of choice.

4. Let’s get physical – As rare as ducks toes, this one involves an extended embrace and a kiss that requires a tilted head in either direction and you know what comes next.

Well the last one may well be a fragment of my Scorpio imagination, but I hope you get the point. There is no one way we could say we do it.

And picking up who does what is a real skill. I’m an Easy Goes it kind of a bloke. Which can be a bit weird when you come up against The Uneasy. But if you were a How you doin and you greet a Easy Goes it, it turns into an Uneasy.

Like Climate Chaos or whatever it’s called, we need an appropriate response. I suggest we come up with a colour coded system which can be indicated by wrist bands so we can turn Uneasy’s into How you Doin’s.

Are you with me on this or am I going all Malcolm Turnbull on myself?

Image courtesy of Okinawa Soba

“There’s no such thing as good and bad foods, just good and bad amounts!”

A lot of sense prevails with these semi- prophetic words of nutrition wisdom from a friend who is the Dieticians Dietician, Dr Trent Watson.

And this was alive and well in a recent trip to a rural nsw town, where the term “I could eat a cow” was often delivered by the eateries.  Don’t get me wrong, I love a good feed, but there’s a good feed and then there’s a big feed.  And more often than not as consumers the satisfaction is only met by one sense being stimulated – site.

A meal can look good, feel good, smell good, but satisfaction seems only granted when it looks big.

Portion Perfection by Amanda Clarke the temPlate by Watson and Co, are all wonderful observations and attempts to arrest this portion plague that threatens to indulge our Nations bulge.

Check out the size of snack bars these days. Next time you are at the servo take a sneaky peak (like you never did huh?) at how big those suckers have got.  They are getting so big that rumour has it that sooner or later you will require a wheelbarrow to cart them to the car.!

And go on, I dare you not to get 2 for $3, and if you do, just have one and save one for later. Yeah right!

As we live in an overpopulated world that is not far away from global food shortages it’s about time we stopped looking at out food and started tasting it again.

Enjoy small amounts of the so-called bad and big amounts of the good stuff. Take away the guilt and remember Watsons’ Wisdom, there are no bad  types, its just the amounts.

(Image by Joits)

Picture by e453753

Well here in Newie, sometimes it becomes a classic social experiment… Across the creek from us is the blue-collar-come-old-cooks-hill-crew village of Tighes Hill… At one of the main junctions is something you don’t come across everyday… a four-way stop sign… insert dilemma here..

that’s right, everyone has to stop from all directions… the question is, who gets right of way, and is there a right of way? in passing conversation there are a few themes…

“you always give way to your right”

“whoever gets there first”

“whoever has the biggest car wins!”

“look to the right, look to the left, and look to the right again”

well perhaps that last one got mashed up in my tangled neurons with a message I am teaching my little man at the moment, but you get my point… there is no one consistent point of view…

and thus, every two minutes there is a sociology lesson… in screams the late tradey, with middle finger ready to fly at the first person to not let him through… the soccer mum in her X-Trail talking on her phone, oblivious to the old man waiting to the left for her to go… i am surprised there are not more accidents…

and it seems its not a Newcastle thing, not even Australian…   Lionel Deimel covered it and he has a few answers to this deilemma including to change the signs… having a  numbered ordering system and a logic-flow direction symbol are examples… it was also raised by notgartner who basically favours the Darwinian ‘survival of the fittest’ model … does that mean we should get a red breasted car?

hmm… for the meantime, i’m glad to have insurance as we frequent that intersection regularly…

Stay Cool…

lets take a step back, a macchiato is a marked or stained shot of espresso, according to Espresso Cafe Blog you will find this method as tastier and that it an “espresso topped with milk foam.”… i read somewhere in the other day that traditionally the macchiato is stained with milk with no mention of foam/froth… however this created chaos on the service front with the waiting staff struggling to see the difference between the plain espresso and the stained macchiato with the crema looking similar… solution – add foam…

so despite my adventure we take a Pavlovian dog venture down to the local coffee house… yep the same place as yesterday, i feel comfortable with this, and it just so happens that Kim is the barista for the day… i approach her taking note of her alleged nervous appearance yesterday, and she says that she was worried that the other barista did not know how to do it… i say – work away Kin and give me the caffeine juice, the best way you can, and most definitely make mine macchiato thanks!!!
it is cooler today, the sun is shielded by a big grey umbrella of cloud, the breeze is coming from the eastern angle of south and people are rejoicing after yesterdays heat wave… the radio mentioned we would get another slice of celsius pie mid next week, cant wait for that one…
with the swiftness of a first timer on prom night, Kim completes the deal and wishes me on my merry way… she informed me that she puts more froth on top, i take her on a historical tour of macchiato, she likes this little note that the foam may not have actually been a part of the original, but sticks with it anyway…
the machiatto hits the back of my throat and the tang sizzles on my tonsils, i am impressed once again, could this actually be better than yesterday??? hmm, not quite, but it runs a similar parallel… the bounce is factored in, service, atmosphere scores combined it actually registers higher than yesterday, predominantly due to the unmodifiable cooler weather today… we have a new clubhouse leader folks, it has taken over… that’s 13 beans for me…
Tracks Cafe (Take 2) Score
Tang 5/5
Bounce 5/5
Environ 3/5
Total Score  13/15

(note – Environ is a combination of service and atmosphere… while i am happier with this new name, i still think i can come up with a better one…)

Tracks Cafe runs on the Southern platform at Civic station, it is owned and operated by the ever smiling Kim, and her bandy of cafe gypseys are ever efficient and always brimming with cheer… well not so much cheer today, they are a cafe that looks more like a school canteen or kiosk which means that it is open to the elements, zero chance of air conditioning and to sit behind the steaming espresso machine today would have been like living a nightmare…

kim – “you’re not having a coffee today are you?”

me – “yeah i think i will, can you do a long machiatto”

kim – “sure, what size?”

it is at this stage that i start to think that this whole macchiato thing has been a great idea… i mean you can actually see beads of sweat swelling on the skin of the service attendant… what a great social experiment… it is like a right of passage for a cafe to be able to say with confidence that they can do it…

we settle for the regular size, which with supersizing being the new black, i am sure would have been labeled the big bopper, bucket, or huge size just five years ago…

anyway in steps the barista and calmly extracts the caffeine juice from the ground bean and casually steams the milk… meanwhile Kim has re-emerged from the chicken salad role making to see what this macchiato is all about… it is like she is watching something for the first time, i watch as she learns about this wonder of life, espresso and a stained with a smidgen of steamed milk, coated with a smooth shimmer of froth…

i have to have this takeaway, it is too hot to drink here, i march back up Hunter Street, through the cleaned glass door of our building and wait patiently with macchiato in hand for the lift (too hot for the stairs today)…  i enter our level, waltz over to my desk and resume work with my black heaven at the fingertips… the next two minutes are coated with lashings of tang and followed by a mesmeric bounce… this is the perfect way to have coffee, i am convinced, and this macchiato is simply wonderful… i am impressed once again…

Score for Tracks Cafe

Tang                5/5

Bounce          5/5

Experience   2/5

It rates low on experience becasue the weather was so hot that my eyebrows were melting and sweat was channeling to my toes… Service was great as usual and that saved them from a 0 score on experience…

i think i will have to come up with a new name for ‘experience’ as it may imply how long the barista has been on the job or did i enjoy the coffee… it is more of a way of describing the atmosphere and service… any thoughts?

Make mine Macchiato!

1. This is a coffee for the modern man (juggling family, work, sport, hobbies, and being a responsible citizen)… why you may ask? it is less time consuming to drink in a quickening lifestyle, requires less energy to produce, and lowers the chance of burning yourself if you happened to spill it…

2. comes in long and short varieties…

3. enjoys the same amount of variability of its older cousins (latte and cappuccino) in cost, tastes, side effects, and warmth…

4. can tell you if the provider is serious about their coffee (easily distinguished by the “what is that?” or “do you mean a short black?” when you ask for a ‘”macchiato thanks”….

5. the word macchiato is not included in the wordpress dictionary, in fact wordpress as one word does not exist in the wordpress dictionary (please explain?)…

So the idea emerged that i could seek to find the best macchiato experience in Newcastle… there are a few things to note as i begin this journey… everyone gets a second chance draw, this allows for the bad day at the office scenario for the barista, though a tainted first up experience may nullify the second  chance draw at the discretion of the Adventure Committee (me)… And, its a totally subjective experience that takes into account the full gamete of the experience, service, tang, and bounce (more on this in a minute)

Today was the first crack of the whip… a neat little cafe on Hunter Street that a frequented friend does some work at… greeted with a smile and the fact that she was just thinking about how i hadn’t come in yet, i quickly asked the quesion “Can you guys do a long macchiato”… with a bit of trepidation i was dealt a wonderful respionse, “sure”, i start to worry slightly because it was not an overly decisive response… i calmly diverted my attention to a nearby table and eyed off the sweets cabinets where i thought “go on, knock yourself out”… i chose an almondy little tart and was swiftly informed it was part of a coffee and cake deal, nice one…

the cafe is nameless of yet as it has only just recently started up, i met the owner, a wonderful chap who seems to be in a very peaceful place for someone who is jumping into the depths of the ever consuming depths of owner/operating a cafe…  predominately organic produce is served, everything form fresh burgers to take home packs of proper whole dried organic bananas (the real deal, not banana chips)… the cafe is smallish but has a wonderful flow to it, up to four sit down tables and a red couch provides some diversity to seating… the key is the friendly staff, quick service, and feel good organic produce… you can even get organic olive oil refills quite reasonably priced!!!

so the macchiato arrives, a little bigger than i have experienced before, limited froth on top (which is how it is meant to be) and a slight stain of milk… (for the first time i was asked what kind of milk i would like used -  impressive service indeed)… the friend asks me if i knew that macchiato means “stain” which for me is a great little side, showing that this cafe loves coffee, just like me… in fact Wikipedia gives the same definition of a macchiato… even though it was a little larger it actually had a nice ‘tang’ to it… this is the best way to describe the lingering taste of coffee that i like, and the strength in the flavour…

i enjoy this experience, but also am mindful that it may have been tainted by me knowing the barista and actually telling them of my quest, so it is hardly a blinded-controlled trial, random, but hard to control in this case… the cost for the Macchiato and tart was $5.50, i think that it was worth it…

as i leave i still have the tang and it is joined by the great side effect of coffee – the ‘bounce’… a term i have developed to describe the feeling you get as you walk out the door and know you have just received the dietary equivalent of a jump start, you bounce down the street…

great first up experience… i guess i have to come up with a rating system, perhaps beans will be the best

Tang                                                                     4/5

Bounce                                                                4/5

Experience (Service, Atmosphere)         4/5

So it is 12 Beans (out of 15) for the Organic Cafe in Hunter Street (opposite spotlight) for this installment (I will definitely come back)…

Till the next time, its so long from Macchiato Man

Waxalyrical aims to navigate the highly ambivalent waters of pop and sub cultures of Australian urban existence… Topics will include (but not limited to) social, physical, mental, and spiritual health; the state of our communities; the indigenous experience from a non-indigenous perspective; sport and its relationship to culture; and interesting points of modern life…

Sit back and enjoy the ride… Remember that in the case of an emergency, there is an oxygen mask above and a boyancy vest is located below your seat… we hope you enjoy your stay…

Waxalyrical